All, to Some Extent, Sentences of the Night

📖Noui Boksunga by Kim Shin-hoe and 8 others

When I see the word ‘peach,’ I strangely feel jealous.

Regardless of whether it’s firm or soft, to me, a peach is jealousy.

It’s as cute and plump as a baby’s bottom,

and when you bite into it, the bursting juice is so incredibly sweet,

its delicious taste makes me inexplicably resentful.

And what about the fuzzy down that covers it?

For those who dislike it because it causes severe allergies,

its hateful ability to exact cruel revenge only fuels my jealousy.

wasn’t a story about jealousy.

It’s a collection of soft secrets carefully revealed by 9 writers.

They, who poured out even their secrets with such elegant prose, are like peaches.

I’m jealous. Humph!

📝 Thoughts and Sentences I Liked

pg.13

And yet, I believed I was in love with my work. Work made me fall for such illusions. That if I tried hard, things would go well, that someone would recognize my true worth, that if my work succeeded, I too would become a wonderful person. Even if that belief shattered, there was still the expectation that if I tried once more, a new opportunity would come.

pg.133

Somehow, the world flows slowly, and even when my sweat cools, I don’t feel cold. It’s like when I sip an iced coffee for an hour, or during an evening drink. It feels like secrets are melting away. But that’s only for a moment, and then my mood inevitably sours again. I feel like shouting out, but then I think I should hide my true feelings, and obsessive thoughts begin. Alcohol and coffee affect my mood. If they made me feel good, they’ll make me plummet just as much. To keep feeling good, I’d have to drink them endlessly, but then my heart might stop. I’m not afraid of my heart stopping, but I’m afraid of not being able to drink alcohol and coffee.

pg.139

Horticulture is the study of the relationship between plants and humans. Among the classes I took in college were plant physiology, morphology, floriculture, pomology, olericulture, horticultural therapy, apiculture, and turfgrass science.

pg.150

People who see me act this way jokingly say, “Soyoung-ssi, I thought you were meticulous, I’m disappointed.” Then I reply, “I can’t help it. This is me.”

pg.160

The Pilates instructor’s “Well done,” which you can hear just by following a movement correctly, is one of the few pure compliments an adult can receive. It’s also a pleasant feeling to meet someone who focuses solely on your body and movements for about an hour. Since starting Pilates, I’ve been thoroughly enjoying all these benefits.

pg.168

But a song is an already written story, and that has its own meaning. If I sing it in my own way now, there will be another kind of joy. And isn’t it comfortable and human to be moderately good and somewhat lacking, just as I am now?

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pg.172

Pale Blue Dot is the name given to the photograph of Earth taken by Voyager 1.

“Consider the countless atrocities committed by people from one corner of that tiny pixel against others on another side of the same pixel, people whose appearances are almost indistinguishable. Consider how frequent the misunderstandings were, how often they tried to kill each other, and how strong their hatred was. Our posturing, our imagined self-importance, our delusion that we hold some privileged position in the universe, all lose their basis when we look at that pale blue light. The Earth we live on is a lonely speck in the great cosmic dark that surrounds us. If we understood how insignificant we are in that vast universe, we would realize that even if we destroy ourselves, no help can come from outside to save us.” (From Carl Sagan’s writings on the Pale Blue Dot)

pg.173

I received the compliment awkwardly, feeling shy, but strangely, that remark about my flexibility became a comfort to me whenever things were tough. Like a reed that couldn’t become a tree, I swayed, but thankfully, I haven’t broken yet. I’m not someone who endures with unwavering conviction, but rather someone who survived and grew stronger by agonizing over what to do. I’ve grown to like that person a little now.

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pg.191

During that time, I read countless books, met people, and listened to songs. I watched several movies and dramas back-to-back and walked for a long time down dark alleys. I also sat at outdoor tables in front of closed cafes, feeling the river breeze, and had long conversations. It was because of those nights that I’ve been able to write several books until now. The sentences in those books are all, to some extent, sentences of the night. Whether that’s good or bad is beside the point.

pg.197

Sometime ago, whether I’m alone or among people, I often fall into old memories. I just slip into them, like falling into a trap while walking down the street. The reason I keep falling into old memories is because I have too many of them.